Notes from me

Where have I been?

Its been a long time my dear friends … Too long. Writing now, I look back and honestly can’t find where I was. I know it sounds strange, but let me explain.

Having had our second child in November 2013, my life was filled with so much joy. I finally had my little boy and with my first-born daughter, Hubby & I had our pigeon pair. In fact they call it Irish twins as they are exactly 1 year and 1 week apart! Joy was oozing out of our home and my heart because I felt like I accomplished so much & both kids are healthy & happy. I also managed to have a natural birth again which was what I had hoped for but I will spare you those details!

I was lucky enough to get 4 months maternity leave. This was awesome because I could bond with my boy and spend time with my girly too. The recovery after giving birth varies and I was blessed enough to say after 2 weeks I was good to go and even fitting into my pre preggy jeans! Life couldn’t get better … But in fact, it went the other way, crumbling into a time I actually can’t even remember. My body was saying enough but I didn’t realise.

After months of battling with no sleep, depression and my physical deterioration I and many others put it down to exhaustion and having 2 kids under 2 years of age. BOY WERE WE WRONG!

I will never forget this day, because it saved my life. I was sitting at the pediatrician with my daughter as she was to have her tonsils removed after yet another stay in hospital. Dr. Sid Singh took one look at me and said “Mom, before we start with Hannah, lets start with you. You look very sick!” From that moment on; after falling into my bedroom window with my baby, after feeling faint when I never ever had in my whole life, after looking like I have been awake and partying for weeks, after sounding slow, zombie’d and picking up weight with no appetite, after feeling extremely cold, down, sad and hating my life, after looking yellow and ill, after months of talking to myself to get a grip and get with the flow of life, after months of feeling like a failure as a mom, friend, wife and family member, after knowing my body is changing but thinking its just fatigue, after literally crumbling and thinking Im the worst, weakest women ever … I finally got the right help.

I was diagnosed  with severe Hypothyroidism & chronic stage 3B Kidney disease.

The pathologist called me the evening after I went for blood tests that Dr Sid Singh immediately instructed I do, and was told by the pathologist that I needed to get on medication that night. To give you an example of the severity, a woman should be in the range of 1-4 in a thyroid blood test. I was over 100!! … Hence a prompt call from the pathologist and my GP.

How could my GP have missed this I thought? How could I have missed this?

My daughters paediatrician was the only doctor (and I work around doctors every day!) who saw how ill I was!  I can say one thing for sure –  I am glad he is my children’s specialist and now mine too!!

So I am on chronic medication and should be good as new by 2015 I am told. My life seems brighter and I feel more myself never mind sounding and looking like myself. I am sorry that I have been so out of touch with blogging. I really couldn’t even cope with my life or children nevermind blogging or some ME time.

I have done a picture history of myself, my recovery and hope that more women will be more aware of this silent but very violent condition. One day I will share more.

Here’s to having time with you all and for a better, healthier life.



1 thought on “Where have I been?”

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